While I don’t have an entire room to call my own, I do have a small corner of our attic to call my own. Until I get a chance to build my new office in the basement, this will be where I do all of my computer work. Considering I haven’t been able to do much in the past 4 months due to Jackson trying to pull out every single cord, it’s nice just to sit here and type out a quick post. Ahhh….
Today was my first day off in a week. When I say a week, I literally mean a week. I just got done working the past 7 days straight. It sucked. Big time.
So on my first day off in a week, I wanted to do three things. Luckily, all three of these things go very well together.
Instead of sleeping in, I decided to set the alarm clock so that we could all get up and make the most of the day. We did just that, leaving the house around 11am for a day where nothing was planned at all.
It was great!
First we headed to the mall to look around. While there, I got to have a real lunch with my wife and son for the first time in a long time.
After lunch, we went and hit some of the End Of Summer sales going on. We ended up making out like bandits at J.C. Penny’s! The savings were literally epic!
I AM THE KING OF SAVINGS!!
Not only did we get a ton of clothes for Jackson, but we ended up buying his first pair of shoes that actually came in a real shoe box! This task was not accomplished without a little heartache though. After having Jackson’s feet sized by the clerk, I heard what no father wants to hear — my son has been cursed with his father’s wide feet. Yes, my son got his dad’s Hobbit feet. Not only are shoes going to be difficult to get for him, but they’ll be pricey as well. On the bright side, if he ever wants to go as Frodo for Halloween, being short, having wavy hair and wide hairy feet will be a natural born bonus!
Once we were done at the mall we went and did some more shopping in the surrounding stores. While in Babies R Us we starting talking about Jackson’s upcoming birthday in October. Since Party City is literally across the parking lot in the next plaza, we made the trek over there to look at invitations and themes. After going back and forth, I think we may have come to a compromise by joining elements from 2 different themes to create one kick ass party. Oh yeah, I decided to have a little fun while we were there as well.
After all of our shopping was complete, we headed to my parent’s house since I got an email* while at the mall that my mother’s computer needed a little geekly TLC. The computer, feeling intimidated by being in the presence of such Geek Godliness, needed but 1 single keystroke to rid it of its ailments. (+1 inanimate intimidation received!) After that we all hung out for an hour or so before picking up some Chinese food from the always excellent Asian Cafe and headed home to feast.
Right now Jess is watching TV, Jackson is roaming the house playing with whatever he can get his hands on, and I’m at the kitchen table with my laptop. Did it suck having to work 7 days straight without any time off? Absolutely! Was it worth it all for a day like today. Without question, it was all worth it!
*If you had told me 6 years ago that I would be receiving emails while at the mall without a computer I would have called you crazy…and then killed you for your Time Machine. Mmmm…Time Machine.
Living alone and being single for over 2 years does something to a person. You learn to become self reliant, self sustaining, and hopefully at the end of it all, at peace with yourself. What you also learn how to do is be your own master. You come and go as you please, and do what you want, when you want, where you want, and how you want.
For me, my life was quite simple back then. I worked 9 hours a day, came home to an empty house, and geeked out until Zero Hour*. I would build and configure server after server-learning as I went along. I would code and re-code this website. I would play game after game. I would talk with JP over AIM and plan out how we were going to take over the tech world. Life was good. But beneath it all, at the end of all my geeking and gaming, I went to bed alone. I woke up alone.
To this day I dream about having those days back. When I have a really frustrating day at work, all I want to do is come home, walk into my computer room, and lose myself in tech and geekdom. But today, there is no computer room. There is no time to sit on the computer to learn a new coding language or to play the latest shooter. When I come home, I go from Trevor Shafer Retail Manager to Trevor Shafer Husband and Father. And I hate to admit that there are days I wish nothing more than to return to those days.
Luckily, wishes really are granted sometimes.
A few weeks ago Jess and Jackson went for a week long trip to her mother’s house in New Jersey. My wishing for those times to return had finally been granted. True, I still did not have my computer room back, but I did have every night to myself to geek out as much as I wanted to. So how did I make use of this well earned time? I sat around thinking about how empty and quiet the house was. I missed the laughter of my little boy and the loving eyes of my wife. Instead of jumping on the computer as soon as I got home, I would call them to see what they were up to. Instead of being on the computer until Zero Hour I would take the dog for long walks to escape the maddening silence of our home. In the end, this wasn’t what I had hoped it would have been.
Being along for those 2 1/2 years was one of the best things to happen to me. I finally got to explore who I was and what kind of man I wanted to be. I got a kind of freedom that some people never get to experience. Best of all, I was able to bring that chapter of my life to a close on my own terms and at a time of my choosing. It was me finally being sick and tired of not having someone in my life that lead me to Match.com. It was there a week later that I was sent an email with a picture of a very cute girl from the state of New Jersey. It was me, after an hour of deliberation, that finally clicked on her picture to let her know I was interested in talking to her. And it was me 15 months later that got down on one knee and asked her to be my wife.
Although I may yearn for the days of old, it’s not who I am anymore. I have proudly added the skills of husband and father to my geekliness. I am more happy than I could ever image. Instead of rushing home to a waiting computer, I am greeted by my smiling wife and excited son.
I am exactly where I want to be.
*Zero Hour is a pre-determined time where I must go to bed. The time is set exactly 5 hours before my next scheduled work shift. This gives me 4 hours for sleep, and 1 hour for food, shower & commute.
Last night when I came home from work I decided that since I was alone, I would finally go thru the task of sorting through my digital archive. We’re talking about 4 large spindels of CDRs and DVDs that I have burned over the years. I initially set out on this task because I was looking for a few files. While I did not find all of the files I was looking for, I did come across some very unexpected gems.
I found 2 anime songs that I thought had been lost forever when my 250gb hard drive crashed years ago. I also found a CD containing all of my old websites. This was great because I now have almost a complete very of all my pervious designs; something I have been searching for along time. As an added bonus, I had found an copied over directory from my remote web server back in 2003. This was a goldmine find! In this directory was a installed copy of NewsPro, which was the CGI/PERL script I used to use back in the day for my blog. Sitting on my laptop in bed at 4:30am, I was able to pull out about half a dozen ‘lost posts’ from 2003! Back then I was horrible about archiving my website and every time I did a redesign, I ended up losing my entire archive. In the past few years, I have been painstakingly trying to reconstruct those posts thru found files and archive.org screenshots. So, finding a file that containing 5 posts from February 2003 that I never even knew existed is awesome! After reading the posts, I even remember writing these.
They have been added properly with their original date and time codes into the Twev1701.net archives. There are a few picture links that are missing, and my next task will be to track those down.
Now I just need to find the ultimate honey hole which would be a file containing the very first posts from Twev1701.com, circa 2001.
I was off from work today (first day in the last 7) and we ended up sleeping in a lot later then we planned. Normally this would be no big deal, but JEss really wanted to do something today. By the time we all got showered, dress, fed, and I ran my quick errands, it was already 2pm. With most of the day already behind us, and Jess not knowing what she wanted to do, I was left to come up with some ideas. I needed to come up with something that was easy on the wallet, open late, and fun. What fits all of those specifications? Knoebels of course!
We loaded up the PT Cruiser and set out a night of fun and eating at Knoebels. At least, that was the plan.
When we left Wilkes-Barre the sun was beating down and I was wearing my sunglasses. By the time we entered Catawissa, I had to put my regular glasses on because it had gotten that dark. There was a storm front coming down on us.
We got the park well ahead of the storm. We walked around for a while, and ended up getting something to eat. Jess got her usual baked potato and I got a slice of pizza. Jackson enjoyed the bottle and formula he brought with him. While Jess got her potato, I took him out of his stroller and sat him up on the table. He loved seeing all the nights, the moving canopy, he music, and all the people.
After we ate, we started walking around some more. About 15 minutes later, it started to drizzle and the wind really started to pick up. I suggested we head for the log flume and hide out under the International Food pavilion. We found a nice table and ordered up some food. About 15 minutes later, this happened.
This went on for the next hour. All in all, it actually wasn’t that bad. We just kept ordering more food and actually had a great time during the storm. In fact, because of the storm, we discovered that Jackson loves cornbread muffins and honey chicken.
After the storm let up to a heavy drizzle, we walked around (and ate!) for a few more hours until we finally decided (Jackson did actually) to head home around 8:30pm. While true, I did get a little wet because I gave Jess the umbrella, it wasn’t nearly as bad as it sounds. I was never soaked thru, and my shirt was about as wet as it would have been if I had went on the log flume once or twice. The nicest thing about the evening was that the park cleared out after the storm. Not being a fan of crowds, this was fabulous!
At the end of everything, this was great impromptu trip that will go down the record books.
After the shift I has last night at work (it was bad) I decided that Jess and I did indeed need to get away. So while home on dinner, we put our plan into motion. She contacted her mother in New Jersey and we now not only have a babysitter for Jackson so mom and dad can sneak away to the beach, but we also have a nice jumping off point which will cut our drive time in half. And thanks to an old friend and his awesome wife, we also now have a dog sitter for Loki.
The only thing left to decide this morning was which beach to go to. Jess and I used to love to frequent Sandy Hook, but in the past couple of years, we have fallen madly in love with Ocean Grove. After doing come research on Google Earth, here is the breakdown.
From Dianne’s house to Sandy Hook — 1hr 35min
From Dianne’s house to Ocean Grove — 1hr 36min
Even though they are approximately 5.9mi apart, it only equates to an extra minute of travel time. So obviously distance is not going to be and issue. With that said, I think we are once again heading to Ocean Grove. Not only is it a nicer beach, but it’s a beach town whereas Sandy Hook is just a beach with a few snack bars. The hardest part is going to be leaving Ocean Grove only after a few hours!
As for Jackson, we have debated taking him or leaving him with his grandmother. In the end, we decided to leave him behind this year. He doesn’t do well in the heat, and with just learning to walk, I have a feeling he’ll not only be frustrated by the sand, but will be eating handful after handful. Next year he’ll be walking and talking, which means that we’ll plan a proper beach vacation with our little guy. Also, it would be nice for mommy and daddy to get away, even if it is only for a few hours!
So I am now pinching every penny and counting down every minute until this trip takes place. Is it too early to start packing??
Yesterday my wife and I finally cashed in our Christmas present that my sister-in-law Jenn got us. No, we’re not a little slow to return things to a department store that was purchase 6 months ago. What Jess’s sister got for us for Christmas was pretty cool and unique.
When she came up for Jess’s birthday party in December, she was a little late. We did think anything of it since anyone who knows Jess’s family know that they are collectively late about 98% of the time. It’s like gravity; that’s just a fact and it’s not going to change for anyone. Anyway, we never thought twice about it until we all got together later in the month for our belated Christmas. At my mother-in-law’s house, Jenn handed Jess a standard clothing box and said this was for both of us. I was intrigued since not too many people know we tend to wear each others underwear quite often. (let’s just forget I just typed that) When Jess opened up the box it was full of paperwork. At first I thought Jenn was trying to pass off some work onto us, when Jess started to really look at it. Here, when she was late to Jess’s birthday party, she was really shopping for us in downtown Wilkes-Barre. In this box were gift certificates to the local theater downtown, our favorite thai restaurant Thai Thai, and Barnes & Noble. Not only was this cool since all of these locations were on the same block downtown, but in with the certificates was a note from Jenn stating that this was a ‘date night’ and that she would come up when we decided to use these and babysit Jackson for the day. Awesome!
Flash forward to yesterday. We finally cashed in our Christmas present. In the morning we woke up, got dressed, and headed to Gavin’s baseball game. It has rained all morning, but by the time his game started at 11:30am, the sun was out and the skies were blue. We watched his game, and right at the end of the last inning, we left to go meet Jenn who was at our home. Since the field is only across the street from our house it was not that far to travel. About 1/4 of the way home, we met Jenn who was walking over to see us. We all walked back and gave Jenn the 10 minute down and dirty tour of Jackson’s world and what to expect. By 1:20pm, we were in the car, on the way to the theater to see ‘Iron Man 2′, and our official date night had started.
The movie, first and foremost, was awesome. Granted, I would have to say that I like the first one better simply for the fact that I LOVED watching him build his suit. But no matter how you look at it, the second movie kicked ass! After the movie, neither one of us was too hungry, so we walked over to Barnes & Noble. This is where a hilarious and weird thing happened.
As per our usual protocol when entering a book store, we walk in together and quickly go our separate directions. As much as we love each other, our tastes in literature rarely overlap. Usually I’m starships and Stargates, while she’s more, well, anything else really. So, we go our separate ways and browse. I head right for the Sci-Fi/fantasy section, my usual favorite place in any book store. While browsing, nothing really caught my eye. As I was looking at the last rack of books, one did catch my eye. The book was ‘Flash Forward’ by Robert J. Sawyer. This is the book the television series of the same name was based on. I know the book differs from the TV series since David Hewlett talked about it on Twitter while he was reading it. Since we had gift cards, and I didn’t have to worry about hitting my back coffers up to purchase this tome, I grabbed it and continued my browsing.
After another 20 minutes or so of browsing, I happen to run into my wife in the back of the store. I noticed she had a book in her hand. We walk over to each other to see what each of us had found. When we go about 6 feet away we both started laughing. Somehow, some way, without every discussing it, we both had picked the EXACT same book out to purchase. What the hell are the odds of that? Now, I can understand this event if we had talked about picking up the book the next time we were out. But to my knowledge, we have NEVER talked about the book at all, let alone buying it at some point. After laughing about how creepy and funny this event was, we ended up spending another 30 minutes or so looking at more books and left the store with a nice bounty of new editions for our bookshelves. After this, we headed straight for dinner at Thai Thai.
Dinner there was amazing as always. I decided to feast upon the ginger duck, and Jess had a whole, fried fish. Funny story about the fish actually. After Jess ordered the fish, our waitress came back over to our table about 2 minutes later and asked if she wanted the whole fish — fins, head, tail and all — or just fillets. My wife, not only being the adventurous type, but am amateur foodie as well, opted for the whole shebang. Impressed with her decision, I applaud he choice. Then a few minutes later, a look of dread come over her face. She had never asked how big said whole fish was. What if they bring our this huge 4ft fish that requires a separate table just to present it? What if it’s so big that every time she cut into it, the kinetic force of her knife make the tail flop and hit’s the fine couple siting next to us? Worried about being presented by a possible ichthyosaurs, she calls the waitress back over and inquires about the size of said fish. Much to her delight, she is told the fish will only be about 14″ long. Crisis overted.
After dinner, we go to do some more shopping and are home by 8pm. After thanking Jenn for watching Jackson all afternoon, she heads back home to New Jersey and we relax with Jackson for an hour or two. I say an hour or two since Jackson was asleep by 10pm and we were both in bed by 10:45pm. Even though it was an early bedtime for all of us (totally by choice), we had an awesome day!
Today is Mother’s Day, and Jackson and I are letting Jess sleep in as late as she wants to. we’ve been playing in his room for the better part of an hour now. Today’s is my last day off for a week, so I think we’re all going to spend it relaxing around the house together. A perfect end, to a perfect weekend. Mission accomplished.
Today I officially went back to a ‘normal’ schedule at work. I say it is ‘normal’ in the sense that I am not closing 4 days a week anymore due to my wife being in school. That’s right folks! My wife officially finished with her schooling yesterday. Are we done for good? Lord only knows. What I do know is that this is the first time my wife has been done with school in almost 3 years. Granted, she did take a few months off to have Jackson, but in my mind, she’s done now. Like, done done.
So, being that I don’t have to close all the time anymore, I was gifted with a nice 7am-4pm shift. Some people may look at that shift and think it’s pretty shitty since I have to wake up and be at work by 7am. Before you judge, look at it from my perspective. I’m usually up around 7am anyway to take care of Jackson, and then I get the honor of working until 11pm at night. Now I get to wake up about an hour earlier, and be done with my work day a full 7 hours earlier. Yeah, that’s cause for celebration, baby!
Today was one of those days that you dream about during the cold, grey days of winter. The sky was the perfect shade of blue, there were wispy clouds in the sky, the sun was shining and warm, and yet, there was a nice cool breeze blowing to keep you from sweating. In essense, it was the perfect spring afternoon. Knowing I did not want to miss out on this, I hurried home, got dressed, and took Jackson our for his first foray into the yard.
As Jackson and I made our way out into the yard, I literally stopped and looked around. Our side yard, where we typicall enjoy most of our outdoor activites, is nice, fenced in, but totally in the shadow of the house all afternoon. I was afraid that it would be too cool for Jackson. So, on whim, we headed down into the backyard, an area we literally only go into when we need to access the garden. After sitting there with Jackson and my wife for about 30 minutes, I looked around and really had to wonder why we don’t use this area more often. I mean sure, you’re exposed on 3 sides and there is little to no privacy, but just hanging out doesn’t really require any privacy. In fact, the backyard, though sloping in several different directions, actually makes more sense for outdoor activites than my severly sloping side yard.
I took a lot of pictures this afternoon while we were in the backyard. After downloading them to my Mac and taking a look at them in iPhoto, a few stood out to me. These were the ones that made me really wonder why we don’t use the backyard more often. For instance, take a look at this picture.
Doesn’t that look inviting? The green grass, the blue skies, and the little fence I put in years ago to keep Loki contained. Here’s a look at the same scene from the other side.
I think once we all get over the stigma of using the backyard rather than the side yard, we’ll find that its not the desolate wasteland we once thought it to be. In fact, I think you’re going to be seeing a lot more pictures like this this summer.
This is the first weekend that I can remember achieving perfect balance between relaxing and getting things done. Here’s how the weekend started.
I woke up Saturday morning later than expected, but it was not unwelcomed. Jess was kind enough to get up with Jackson and allow me to sleep in since I was at work late the night before. Since Kelly and Katie were coming up fr the weekend, I decided get a start and go get the supplies I needed for the projects I wanted to get done. After fighting mall traffic for a few hours, I returned with everything I needed. Having picked up lunch on the way home from Sonic, I jumped right into my first project – cutting the grass. Once that task was complete, my next project was tackled – planting new grass. After removing the dead grass in the side yard and working the soil, I planted new grass and gave it a nice healthy drink. It was right around this time that Kelly and Katie showed up. I put away all my yard tools and headed inside to spend some time with them. After about 2 hours, we were all getting a little hungry, so I hopped in the shower and we headed off to the buffet at the casino for dinner. After an amazing dinner, we came home, relaxed a talked for a few more hours, and we all headed to bed.
This morning was my turn to get up early with Jackson. So, letting my wife and the girls sleep, I was up with Jack at 8:20am. After his bottle, we playing on the floor for about another 20 minutes until he ended up falling asleep on me…literally. Being tapped by my little man, I decided that I should take a little cap nap myself. After our mutual 45 minute nap, we got up and joined the newly awakened women in my living room. After they played with Jackson for a few minutes, the conversation turned to food and our lack thereof. So, I threw on some clothes and headed to the grocery store to fulfill their desire for breakfast sandwiches. Once at the grocery store, I decided it was foolish not to pick up a full order of food for the next 2 weeks, so I did just that. After getting home and having Jess help me put everything away, I made good on their request and made my ladies some breakfast sandwiches for brunch. After brunch, we again talked for a few hours and then the girls decided to head home. Once they left, Jess had to start her homework, and I treated myself to a long overdue haircut. After a nice shower to rinse away all those cut follicles, I got Jackson dressed and we headed outside with some power tools to put up his new porch swing that I bought him the day before. After about 20 minutes of work, he was in his new swing and loving every minute of it. But don’t take my word for it!
After we got done swinging, Jack and I headed back inside and played for the rest of the day, with a few naps mixed in there. Around 7pm, Jess was done with her homework so I made some homefries and grilled up a couple of 6oz. sirloins for dinner. Everything turned out most excellent. After dinner, I played with Jackson some more until my wife had to go to bed. Once she want to bed, I Jack and I watched some TV until he fell asleep on my chest again, at which point, he was put to bed.
All in all, it was a most excellent weekend. I got everything done that I set out to do, and I still got to have a fun and relaxing time with some great friends. And best of all this weekend, I got the spend the majority of today like this!
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